non-jokes

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  • December 10, 2017 at 2:14 pm #78641
    Avatar photozn
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    The first is from Nittany, off of facebook.

    1. Two scientists walk into a bar.
    “I’ll have H2O,” says the 1st.
    “I’ll have H2O, too,” says the 2nd.
    Bartender gives them water because he is able to distinguish the boundary tones that dictate the grammatical function of homonyms in coda position, as well as pragmatic context.

    2. How do you make a hormone?
    Synthesize it with recombinant DNA.

    3. What do you get when you cross a horse and a man?
    A centaur.

    4. What do you call an african-american who flies a plane?
    A pilot.

    5. Why was six afraid of seven?
    It wasn’t. Numbers are not sentient and thus incapable of feeling fear.

    6. What do you get when you cross a joke with a rhetorical question?

    7. What did the girl say when she was stung by a bee?
    Nothing, she was allergic.

    8. Where did Susie go during the bombing?
    Everywhere.

    9. What did Goldilocks say to the three bears?
    She asked them how bears make porridge without opposable thumbs.

    10. What do you call a joke with no punchline?

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